“CT confirmed – dissection, type A”
“Bad news; tamponade.”
Faces turned grey. Dreams of simple cases, of lunch breaks or stops for coffee, simple schedules, life saving, heroism; all turned away.
A great vessel torn apart, the ferocity of pressure searing it open, and with it, natural order ripped, internal chaos commanded, for years of chronic pressure, body reprimanded.
Blood leaking back, bursting through tissue bursting through muscle through fibres and pooling.
Unnatrually stagnant. Muffling, constricting, blocking the heart. Drum sounds stifled as the body gasped for blood.
“Is there anything here that anyone can do?”
Emergency doctors looked at cardiac doctors looked at emergency nurses looked at cardiac nurses looked at SHOs looked at emergency doctors. The lowly lucky students, basking in our insignificance, were excluded from this circle of desperation,
hidden under layers of poker faces, professionalism and probity.
All that stared were aware that woefully,
Odds were slim.
Blood pressure dropping
Odds were slim
Sats were dropping
Odds were slim
No air ambulances, and odds
With a glimmer in it’s eye and a smirk, and cackle
Became even slimmer
And now. Wait.
Wait for a flash of brilliance, instruction. Wait for a decision.
Wait for someone to decide on a 65 year old life.
A 65 year old life, who 24 hours ago was in the garden, family surrounding, laughing, enjoying, wife makes lemonade, children play, he sits and admires the idyllic display. Or perhaps;
A 65 year old life who 24 hours ago was crying for an out. Argument with the wife, divorce impending, considering the knife, considering an ending, or more likely
A 65 year old life who 24 hours ago, and 24 hours before, and 24 hours before; normal, ordinary, practically a bore. Uneventful days followed by uneventful nights followed by typical routines followed by timetabled lifestyle followed by average events followed by
Gasp. Splutter. Weakness. Pain.
Searing, tearing, indescribable pain.
Bright lights, monitors, needles.
Bright lights, masks, beeping.
Bright lights, chattering, fading.
Dim lights. Beeping. Slowing.
Dark lights, Gasping.